By Terez Hartmann
Contrast as the Catalyst
It was summer 2015, and all was quiet on the Western Front, but in my case, far too quiet…
Anyone who has ever met me knows that this Firewoman really loves being out and about performing, speaking, and enjoying the fun of frolicking with my fellow fabulous three-dimensional people. But this summer all of that was about to change…
Aside from teaching two weekly Belly Core Fitness classes, every other project I had in the works required time working exclusively behind the scenes, with many hours in the studio and sitting in front of my laptop. Though my logical side knew this was necessary and beneficial right now, my inner performer started climbing the walls, and after only a month of quiet time, I managed to move into a penthouse suite in funky-vibe town. There I found myself dancing with doubt, sadness, fear, dis-ease, and a whole buffet of less-than-fabulous-everythings—a state that I had not visited in well over 15 to 20 years. Needless to say, this started getting old very quickly, and I knew that in order to get back to being my usually happy self, there were two things I needed to do:
- Release resistance in whatever way I could
- Rediscover my inner fire and focus on NEW possibilities in my life
Letting Go and Finding the FIRE
I started by asking myself two of the scariest questions ever: “If I never performed or spoke in front of an audience ever again, could I be okay?” and “If I never worked in my field ever again, would I still be a valuable, worthy human being?” And when I answered those questions honestly, my response was…
“No.” Yikes.
When the dust cleared and I realized that I had unknowingly come to tether my sense of self-worth to my work, I knew it was time for a serious belief upgrade, and that it was also time for me to find and remember my authentic self—who I am at the core without the events, full schedule, or fancy titles. My sole (soul) mission at this stage: Be good and kind to myself and only do things that truly nurtured my spirit—no matter what.
After a few weeks of making and keeping this commitment to my own well-being, I decided to ask those big, scary questions again. This time, my answer was a clear and resolute, “Yes.”
The Decision: BEING the FIRE
After taking this step, I decided that I would prioritize my joy in a bigger, clearer way than ever before, and that it was only through “looking for love in all the wrong places” (as Johnny Lee and Abraham-Hicks would say) that I had lost my way. What my soul and spirit wanted was actually quite simple—to love myself and have a great time while becoming more—and to “be a light” in whatever way I could. So with this recognition, I decided that no matter what I had on the schedule (or not) I could enjoy my life by following my muse, creating music and words for the pure love and joy of it, and BE a light by radiating the joy in my heart, which I could share with anyone, in any place, and at any time. In short by BEING the fire and keeping it lit from WITHIN, I could have access to joy and my core, authentic self any time!
Feeding the FIRE: Authentic Appreciation
As my spirits continued to rise, I also got back to my daily practice of putting appreciation in writing and boy, was I astonished to realize (and remember) how good my life truly was! I still had the love of my life by my side. I still lived in a beautiful home in a highly coveted town, in a state that many only dream of visiting for short periods. I had two adorable, affectionate kitties. I had amazing friends and soul family who loved me unconditionally. I was surrounded by beauty every day with constant access to stunning natural spaces and places. I had access to drums, keyboards, guitars, and all manner of technology for creating music and words, and connecting with the people who mattered most to me. I had tremendous flexibility and freedom. And even if every one of those conditions were to change, I had my faith, knowing, and my connection to the Divine that has—and always would—lead me toward my greatest good when I allowed it.
Creating a Spark: Cultivating an Attitude of Openness without Resistance
During this “chrysalis time” of discovery, evolution, and reconnecting with my authentic self, I decided to start asking myself a few more questions about what I truly wanted. Some of the things on the list were as they had been; continue to travel and explore this beautiful planet, create and share uplifting words, music and adventures, dance-dance-dance, spend time out in nature, etc. But two things really shined especially bright for me; beginning an RV experience in some way and bringing live rock n roll back into my life.
Though I didn’t have a clear path to either of these things at the moment, I simply embraced an attitude of openness, as now that I had remembered my authentic self and intrinsic value, any of these things would simply be the icing on the cake. The freedom of no longer needing any particular thing to “pop” for me to be okay felt SOOO very good, so it was easy to think about these desires with a light and easy heart, and I gained great satisfaction even from just from having those experiences in my mind. This time, that truly was enough.
Life on FIRE: Manifestation Fiesta!
As I write this in October, 2015, and I am truly stunned and in awe of how quickly things have changed!
In addition to many other bonuses, upgrades and happy surprises that wafted in to my life since taking this personal journey, in late August of this year, a wonderful musical gift was dropped off on our doorstep “…With a little help from [a] friend…” and we have since formed (and performed twice as) a working rock-based band called “Fireflower*” and…
…On Friday, September 18th, my hubby and I found a killer deal on a 30-foot class C RV that we rented for five glorious days as our anniversary gift to each other!**
*You can read the juicy and fun “Fireflower” story by visiting my blog page: http://allowingyoursucces.wix.com/terezfirewoman#!news–blog/csc1 Or learn more about the band by visiting www.FireflowerBand.com
**For more about our RV experience, click on the link for “Sparkles & Appreciation List” for September 28th also on this page: http://allowingyoursucces.wix.com/terezfirewoman#!news–blog/csc1
The Bottom Line on Allowing YOUR Success with The FIRE of Authenticity
Is it possible to move from zero prospects and being physically and emotionally funked-up to being in a state of utter joy with magnificent manifestations on top? Like me, we have all “been there,” so it is my intention that this little story reminds you that if you’re willing to let go of resistance, recall the good that IS, don an attitude of openness, and allow the fire of your authentic, eternally valuable self to burn, you absolutely, positively, definitely can allow YOUR success (AKA joy) and find your way home—no matter what.
Here’s to reveling in the true-blue, authentic awesomeness that is YOU!
“So I’ll stand in the all of my being
And I’ll sing with the voices on high
And I will follow the compass of the fire in my soul
And I’ll blaze until this new day is mine!”
—from “Blaze” © TTRH 2015
Terez “Firewoman” Hartmann,“Your catalyst for all things Fab-YOU-lous,” is the author of Allowing Your Success!, a proud contributing author of Transform Your Life! book one and two, a professional Keynote Speaker/Workshop Facilitator, Singer-Songwriter/Recording Artist, “Allowing Adventures!” & “Savor Vacation” Facilitator, and true Renaissance Woman, and Visionary. She keeps her fire lit by embracing and promoting a lifestyle of “Allowing,” and by using creative expression to elevate and ignite the human spirit, a passion that she shares with her husband, soul-mate and creative partner of over 15 years, John Victor Hartmann. Together they share “Allowing TRUE LOVE” workshops and experiences designed to help others attract, allow, and maintain extraordinary relationships, and create custom jingles and voice-overs in their Safety Harbor-based studio, THE Creativity Express. Visit: www.TerezFirewoman.com
