John Emenecker, Appleton, Wisconsin
The Social Confidence Coach
Hi, I’m John. I always felt anxious in my personal life and at work. Dale Carnegie, an anxiety group, and additional research taught me techniques to lower my anxiety in social situations. I learned to change the way I think. I rewired my brain. When I first heard this, I didn’t think it was possible—but it is possible to change your neural network. It took evaluating many social situations, applying these skills consistently in more challenging social situations, and using calming and relaxation techniques to see a change. My desire is to coach what I have learned in Transformation Academy’s life and confidence coach certifications, and techniques I have learned throughout my life. I would like to see others’ lives transformed because it is amazing to freely express yourself without the constant fear of being judged.
What is your niche (coaching focus) and how did you choose it?
I soon will be a social confidence coach, helping those who are socially anxious, shy or struggle socializing to become socially confident. I chose this niche because I have had social anxiety and have been shy for most of my life. I have gone through this transformation, and being able to freely express yourself without the constant fear of being judged is amazing. I would like to help those like me become socially confident in their personal and professional lives.
Who is your ideal client?
My ideal client is any adult who struggles socializing, either because they are socially anxious, shy, or want to improve their social skills.
What inspired you to become a life coach?
I have been through this transformation, and I would like to see others who are socially anxious or shy be able to express themselves to family, friends, coworkers and strangers because it is amazing. My parents noticed I was alone most of the time in school. I almost ended up in the yearbook as the shyest senior. I attended Dale Carnegie. I read Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People. I was in debate and forensics in high school. I wasn’t the best, but I am more comfortable giving a presentation than I am one-on-one or in small groups. I was socially anxious in college and at work. I attended a social anxiety group. Unfortunately, I didn’t complete it because I was socially anxious. It wasn’t until I completed an anxiety group, learned guided mediation, assertiveness and cognitive behavioral therapy, and then applied what I learned consistently over six months that I started to notice a change. A therapist said I needed to retrain my brain. I didn’t think it was possible—but it is. My neural synapses changed, and I now feel less anxious socializing. As I mentioned, I would like to see those who are socially anxious or shy feel what it is like to comfortably and freely express themselves because it is amazing talking to family, friends, coworkers and strangers without that fear of being judged.
How long have you been coaching?
I haven’t started coaching yet, but I will soon. Hopefully, before this issue goes to press. I have been in idea paralysis mode trying to think through how I can help my future clients in their transformation journey.
How did you get your first client?
I haven’t officially helped a client. However, I have helped members in social anxiety and shy Facebook Groups.
How has your coaching journey changed your life?
I feel it will change my life because it is a career, and I will help my clients on their journey. I have been in corporate communications, training, and IT in the past. I didn’t really feel fulfilled. I started looking for a career in a helping field. I believe coaching will fill my desire to impact lives in a meaningful way.
What is the most challenging part of being a life coach?
I believe the most challenging part of starting as a life coach is designing a coaching program that will transform lives. I have taken Transformation Academy certifications and spent a considerable amount of time deciding what to include in my program.
What is the most fulfilling part of being a life coach?
I believe the most fulfilling part of being a coach will be making a difference in my clients’ lives. My favorite quote is “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.” [Mahatma Gandhi] This is the change I would like to be. I would like to see my clients become socially confident.
What has been your most inspirational coaching moment, with a client?
My inspiring moment so far has been helping someone on Facebook who is shy and socially anxious. I have been supporting him on his journey. I see he continues to have self-doubt, fear, rejection, and is shy. However, he is making progress!
What is your favorite coaching activity or exercise to do with clients?
My favorite coaching activity for helping people become socially confident is roleplaying and giving them a chance to practice these skills online and in real life. Reframing your thoughts so they are positive and putting yourself into increasingly challenging social situations are the core elements to becoming socially confident.
What has been the most effective strategy for finding clients and/or growing your business?
I am not sure yet what the most effective strategy will be to find clients. I am working with a business coach and trying to DM potential clients. I am not really convinced that this is the best strategy. I think helping others in Facebook Groups and, if they have found my posts helpful, asking them if I can send them a friend request and DM may be the best strategy. I might try Facebook advertising.
What advice would you give YOURSELF back when you first dreamed of becoming a coach?
The advice I give myself as a coach starting out is to just do it. I have been thinking about this for quite some time. I am confident what I will teach and coach will work. If I have a program in place, I can I ask for feedback and continually improve it.
What is the impact you want to make in this world?
The impact I would like to make in this world is to coach on topics that I have personally experienced transition through addressing, like social anxiety or shyness, or those areas where I am currently experiencing ongoing transformation, like living a healthy lifestyle. I am a cancer survivor and someone recently diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes. I would like to support others on their transformational journeys.
